Tag Archives: should

Friday’s Free Refill: Insight Needs No Should

I wore a green sock not because I SHOULD but because it felt right! Happy St. Paddy’s Day.

Last Friday as much as I wanted to write my weekly blog to you, it was day two after my extensive foot surgery and as much as I felt like I should write because I do this every Friday and you lovely readers expect it, my body, mind and spirit wanted to rest. I truly didn’t have any desire to show up to the blank page. I listened to her and took the day off. (Pain meds could have played a part in it, too.)

I let go of should. I tuned in.

Yesterday, because my recovery had taken on a new twist with a foot blown up like a balloon, an incision that wouldn’t stop bleeding and I cried every time I put my foot down to get on to my crutches – I had a second surgery. Good thing. Three hematomas found. All good now.

As I lay in bed trying to fall asleep last night, I couldn’t sleep.  This is typically never an issue for me. I am often found asleep in the car (passenger side – don’t freak out), on an airplane (don’t worry never in the cockpit), at the theater (never on a stranger’s shoulder), you name it. I wanted to blame it on my hubby snoring next to me, but I was wired. As I tried to settle down, I grabbed my phone from my nightstand which is usually in the kitchen at night, but post op because of being bed- bound, it was accessible. Another late nighter on social media suggested I try a meditation app, Insight Timer. So I did.  (Thank you Cynthia.)

I have practiced meditation for awhile now, but usually self guided. This app offers a wide variety of guided meditations, nature sounds, mantras and more. I was always so defensive about my practice, thinking I should not rely on earplugs to listen, or others help. Ridiculous. But we all come up with reasons that support our  resistance. Plus with the headphones, I could barely hear hubby’s snoring. I relaxed, let go and got to sleep. Just before I drifted off to snooze land my thought was, I want to write a blog tomorrow.

Today, I didn’t listen to the should voice, You should rest, you shouldn’t worry about writing. Screw you Mr. Should, Brother Resistance. Sister Synic, step aside, because I WANT to write. Tuning in to body, mind and spirit it felt right to write.

Where in you life are you letting shoulds push you when you don’t need to be pushed or hold you back when you don’t need to be held back? Is it time to tell Mr. or Mrs. Should to take a back seat? Perhaps you SHOULD put them in the passenger seat and tell them to take a nap.

Hello! I’m Jenny Gwinn McGlothern, Certified Transformational Master Coach for your Life and Spirit, who has been leading retreats for women and coaching them since 2009. One of my favorite ways to fill my own cup is by writing. May my weekly blog give you a sip to reflect, a nugget to chew, a thought to refill. If it is an accountability partner you seek, I offer life and spiritual coaching for men, women, teenagers, and couples, in person in Seattle and by phone.  2017 Mini-retreats in West Seattle 9:30 – 2: June 2 (sold out), September 15 (4 seats left). Limited availability, register early. info@mamaneedsarefill.com or www.mamaneedsarefill.com. 206 255 0463.

Shoulda Woulda Coulda

SHOULDs don’t usually fill ones cup. I will be as bold to say, If you think you SHOULD do it and your heart is not in it then it ain’t fillin’ your cup sista.

I learned something last week that was life giving. I learned that if you decide to do something in consolation, meaning when you are in a good place and decide to back out of it when you are in desolation, meaning not in a good mind set you ain’t doin’ anyone any favors.

Last Saturday during my hot yoga class I vowed to myself to come back on Sunday. It was going to be my church. I was having a great session, noticing the benefits, my body, mind and spirit singing and connected, that I wanted to come back on Sunday.

Well, on Sunday, home with the family, having a wonderful quiet morning, bonding not rushing off to church I felt like I SHOULD stay home. We were gelling as a family. I felt guilty about leaving them to go to yoga. I felt guilty about my decision to take care of my soul, my body, myself.

After polling the family…they were cool with me leaving, so I went. And backing out of the driveway, I remembered what I read a few days earlier, When you are in desolation, don’t go back on decisions you made in consolation. In other words, never back out of something you decide to do when you are in a good place just because in the moment you are in a bad place.

I was so grateful I stuck to my guns, instead of staying home with the family because I felt I SHOULD. We had a great rest of the day together when I returned. I was able to be more present for them because I had filled my cup spiritually and physically.