Mama Needs a Refill

In my HeartWriter Blog (www.heartwriter.wordpress.com) this week I am writing a series on peace.

Peace. Something we all want in our lives. In our striving toward peace we reach out to fill up, to accumulate, to gain, gather all in the name of peace. What would happen if we let go? In our relinquishing of the things we grab on to for the purpose of acquiring peace would we actually find it? Are we just looking for it in the wrong places? In the wrong things?

To embrace peace must we let go to make room for it? What would happen if we surrendered to the constant obtaining of things, knowledge, stuff…would we find ourselves standing right in the middle of this peace we desire?

Oh, but to let go requires practice and to practice requires showing up.

Today I am going to think about what I can let go of to sit more in the lap of peace.  The idea of relinquishing something of this world I think holds value is a bit scary indeed.  I will take a deep breath and listen to the still quiet voice within and hear the wisdom in the whisper.

Sometimes we don’t have to be still for very long, just long enough, to hear deeply. Which just means creating a practice of showing up and letting go and showing up and letting go again.

Pausing with a friend to enjoy a couple pots of tea, we took time to pause between all of our catching up.

In my HeartWriter Blog (www.heartwriter.wordpress.com) this week I am writing a series on presence.

As I reflect on what it means to be present to myself, to others, to God, I see it all starts with a pause. We may resist taking a pause to all around us for fear that we may be late to something, miss out, are not doing enough.

But in the showing up instead to the moment we are living ever more deeply, not too late at all, doing exactly what we are supposed to be doing.

What would happen if you started the next thing with a pause? I will try it if you will. God knows I need support, and I surely need to be reminded.

A moment to breathe allows you to see the light, take your moment now.

We want answers now. The ability to have our little world wrinkle-free, our role as parent defined clearly and without confusion, our path obstacle free.

At the end of our Mama Needs A Refill retreats, I ask the women to share one thing they gained from our time together that they want to carry with them. One nugget of inspiration they want to root deeply in their mind, nurture, and grow in their heart. During last week’s Physical Cup Mini-Retreat one the retreat attendees shared her nugget, that has been a lovely obstacle remover for me in my over scheduled, hectic pace of the last week.

I offer Goddess and Angel card readings during the retreat to each woman and this particular woman pulled a card that was her nugget of inspiration she wanted to not just carry in her pocket but get her through a time of transition.

Where there is breath there is clarity.

That’s it. Pause to breathe.  Pausing to breathe clears the path. Allowing your breath, your divinely inspired breath, to move through your body works miracles.

The answers you seek, the wisdom you desire is all inside of you waiting to be stirred up. You will only hear it, feel it in your bones when you allow your breath to dance inside of you, circle through and rise to the surface.

Where there is breath there is clarity.

And to think we were making it so much more difficult.

Shrunk

I had big plans for today. The kids have a school holiday. I was planning a dream day. I was going to clean the entire house and write. Daughter is at a friend’s, son has three buddies over, a day to nest and get everything in order. I worked a bunch this week, had lots of evenings out, time to catch up on the house.  In my big dreams, the four boys would play as I snapped my fingers like Mary Poppins turning the house into spit spot perfection.

I planned on writing a piece on the wonderful retreat that happened this week. I was going to tell you all about the success of Mama Needs A Refill’s first mini-retreat, the sack lunch series on The Physical Cup. I was going to report on the women’s discoveries, our reflections, our joy that came out of gathering together.

In the 1980’s something movie, Honey I Shrunk the Kids, the miniaturized children had to wave their arms wildly on many occasions before their parents could see them. My physical needs are waving their arms today and I am resisting.

So focused on my agenda, not honoring, but very aware of my physical needs and the waving arms trying to get my attention. Sleep and water. But instead I am drinking coffee at 3:50 in the afternoon, so I can make things spit spot and publish this blog.

This is exactly what the retreat was about this week: being aware of and honoring our physical needs. I have the awareness part down. So aware that I am tired from not getting my normal amount of sleep, depleted from not having enough water, out of whack from not getting to yoga. Perhaps I am not down about it because I have meditated and socialized for my spiritual need and read for my mental need. It can be such a balancing act to do it all, take care of all my needs. That is why I have not showered and am drinking coffee in the late afternoon on this dream day.

My big plans shrunk, but along with it comes a realization that the shrunk down version may just be right for today. I may not have a spit spot house, but the bathroom is clean, the stairs are vacuumed. One kitchen counter is cleared. The boys couldn’t be happier climbing on the furniture spreading cracker crumbs and I couldn’t be happier having completed this blog, drinking my water with my hot coffee, refreshed from sitting on the couch for five minutes, feet up, to write this.

Often our big plans have to be shrunk down to reality. My son's erasers, lost in my empty cup, shown above. Today in my reality, cup is not completely empty, just aware of the missing spots, where I can use a refill.

Every Thursday morning Sonya and I live out our passion for writing. This Thursday we gathered at her kitchen table and I got to be one of the first to purchase her new memoir. Hot tea, friendship, writing...a perfect Thursday morning.

On my fridge I have yet another quote: Only passions, great passions, can elevate the soul to great things.

In her soon to be released memoir, Back on the Court, author Sonya G. Elliott discovers the miraculous healing powers of following her passions. (Check out her book and order it at… www.sonayelliott.com .

Two of Sonya’s passions, writing and playing basketball turned her life around after a train accident that killed her fiancé and left her seriously injured. No excuses, no holding back she courageously fought her battle by delving into what she loves.

That is what a passion does. It makes miracles happen. Passions aren’t accidents or whimsical ideas that help pass time. Passions are those whispers you hear deep inside that don’t go away when ignored. They come back knocking on the door, and we are the only one who can answer.

A book and hot tea all by myself, a slice of heaven in my eyes.

Repeat after me: I am not being selfish, decadent, or greedy by stopping in the middle of my day and doing something just for me. Come on, say it.

As I type this, the tea kettle is heating up and I am going to take 20 minutes to read my book and drink my tea while it is still hot before picking up the kids from school.

Everyone will be better off for it. It is far more important than folding all the laundry and cleaning out the fridge. But fine, if something stinks in the fridge, throw it out then open a book, a magazine, draw a bath, whatever, just do it for you and don’t get caught up in cleaning the whole fridge. We get lost in activities that don’t feed us, putting off the things that do.

Me time isn’t about being selfish it is about being wise. It is amazing how just a little bit of time devoted to your wants and needs changes the family dynamics.

Yes, with my personality it is easier for me to finish the laundry and attend to my list of stuff, but now that I wrote this, I have to do it. I have to show up to myself. Now it’s your turn.

Often a simple walk can refill your cup.

Sometimes are mind gets hell bent on thinking our body needs one thing. Like this morning for example I wanted to get to 6:30 yoga but my husband had to leave the house early. I looked at the rest of my day, yoga wasn’t going to happen.Then walking the with the dog home from school drop off this morning, I kept walking past our house. Not in the morning plan. I was chatting with a mom friend who was headed on a walk, so I just kept walking with her. The short walk got me out of my head. Sure I didn’t sweat like I would have at hot yoga, but I moved my body.

We think we have to drip buckets, burn tons of calories when maybe our body just needs a gentle kick out the door moving in a forward direction.